Addiction Recovery Basics

I guess what I'm really mad at is that when I stopped drinking and drugging they didn't have even Viagra and Ecstasy, heck, they didn't even have fruit flavored wine coolers. I missed out on all that good stuff.

I spent most of the today on the pitypot. Didn't they tell me that when I stop being active in addiction and got into addiction recovery everything would start smelling like roses? Well, you couldn't tell by the type of day I had today. I had a truly sucky day. I won't bore you with details; but it got me thinking some dangerous thoughts. Was I really that bad way back when? I wonder if I could try partying just one more time on the sly to try out the new stuff they have? Who would know?

I've been off alcohol and drugs for 16 years. Is thatcrazy thinking that could go back and use, or what? I started answering those questions… was I really that bad? The answer was yes I really was. Can I try drinking and drugging one more time without getting hooked? No I can't. I mean I drank and drugged every day for 25 years. Let's do the math, 25years x 365 days=9,125 days I used, and I got twisted every time. What makes me think on day 9,126, I can pull off successfully? Those are longshot odds no sane gambler would buck.

My friend Patrick over at SpiritualRiver.com says 'Humility is important for a successful recovery'. Well I sure didn't feel that way today. I felt the world was whirling around me and it stunk. Besides, if I am the victim, I don't have to do anything myself, because it's all your fault, right?

Luckily I have a few relapse prevention skills stashed away and knew it was time to the get to a 12 step meeting, get out of my head, listen and share. I heard exactly what I needed to hear. The women next to me got her hand up just before me. I got mad at that. Then she stated she would have had 16 years sober (the same as me) except she relapsed. Now she has 2 months. I have 16 years sober too, and her sharing helped knock those stupid thoughts out of my head. Was that a coincidence she was next to me and said that? Nope, I don't think so.

What did I do? I simply did What Winners Do.

A thought flew into my head,there is one thing I did perfectly today, in fact it is the only thing I have to do perfectly every day and that was I did not engage in my addiction. Beside that simple fact all else pales. I should know better than to sit on the pity pot. I then thought out some other questions and addiction recovery tools I used in the past but had gotten out of the habit of using.

Maybe these can help you:

How important is it really?

Do I have to do something about it now?

What will I think of myself if I do this?

What will I think of myself if I don't do this?

>Have I tried to help somebody today?

I hope my rant helped you in some way, it sure helped me.

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