Being active in addiction stole my humanity. I became almost like a feral animal, slave to my instincts with an absence of choice. Choice with reason is a unquely human trait
I attended a meeting tonight and the subject of gratitude came up. I came to realize that thing I'm most grateful for being in addiction recovery is the return of choice to my life. When I was actively using alcohol and drugs there was a huge crushing press of weight on my shoulders each morning because I knew what was like happen, I did not have a choice in it. I would wake up, find alcohol or drugs, get wasted pass out, and black out - not remember the night before, wake up and do it all over again. Day in, day out, with no choice or a variation.
With the return of choice and sobriety in my life, at least I have a shot at the brass ring. I have a chance for happiness, before I had no chance. I don't lead a parade every single day waiting to fly around declaring I'm happy, joyous, and free. But I do know that I have the ability to spend my time as I wish it and not be as late to the animal instincts of addiction. Ihave more good days than bad, and I could bever say that before.
Edited by Bill Urell,
MA in Addiction Counseling, CAAP-II, Owner and Editor. -
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3 responses so far ↓
1 SunDrop // Apr 22, 2008 at
What an excellent realization. I am going to pass this on to a friend of mine who is recovering. It seems like the better she does with her recovery, the more problem she faces.
I think she still feels like she doesn't have control. Or perhaps doesn't realize that she does have control again.
Its time for her to take charge!
2 xiflada // Apr 26, 2008 at
Wow. Very well put. I have seen first hand what an addiction can drive someone to do. I too think you loose the ability to pick and decide for yourself as an addict. It is like the people picking up after you are deciding for you not to mention you have no control over drugs.
3 Sam // May 1, 2008 at
There are many reasons behind someone indulging in drug abuse activities. As the life of the people is becoming very busy, they take alcohol and drugs to relieve their stress. Some of the people are alcohol addicted and is unable to leave this habit.
http://www.drugrehabscenters.com/
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