Comments on: Enabler: Are You Enabling Drug Use In A Loved One?

By: Janice

Janice — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 01:20:11 +0000

who can help me ? My son is addicted to pain meds and needs to detox and live somewhere other than with me..I work…I am 71 and he calls on my cell phone on my way home from work looking for money….he haunts me until I give it to him and Ihate myself for doing it…he is sick with out his pills and takes mine too…adivan , that I need to try to stay sane….he has to go somewhere…he is making me sick…do I have any options???? Please someone help me…give me some options…

By: KewizeyBabeii

KewizeyBabeii — Thu, 24 Feb 2011 18:21:55 +0000

I’m in in school suspension right now because there was this brownie going around the freshman class and only 4 of us ate it, me not being 1 of the 4. We have this play family thing going on with me and my friends. So my play son gave my play niece, his play cousin, a brownie. He did not eat it, she asked him for it and he gave it to her. She, then, proceeded to give some to her play mom, who is my play sister and also my real life cousin. She also gave some to one of my play nieces and one of my friends, but my cousin had a reaction to it. I didn’t know what was going on so I went to find out. I found that the brownie came from my play son. He said he was so scared and didn’t know that anyone would get hurt. So I told him since everyone was okay that he shouldn’t tell one himself because he would get expelled. Then got busted for “ENABLING him to do drugs.” That was not what I was trying to do.

By: Angela

Angela — Sun, 13 Feb 2011 02:20:21 +0000

Does anybody know what episode of intervention or what the name of that episode is?

By: Pauline

Pauline — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 04:48:48 +0000

I was the queen of enabling for 18 years. One night I had a dream that I was 70 and my life was insane, and then I woke up and I realized that if I did not change I would be 70 years old and my life would be that same insanity. I was 41. I changed. I am so much happier. Now I am 50 and I am the first to tell you that you are in denial and you are enabling. Now whose living a life of insanity!

By: tongyun

tongyun — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 17:50:41 +0000

I’ve actually had people tell me that if their kid was on drugs that they would allow them to live at home so at least they knew where the kid was. You think you’re doing the person a favor but you’re really not. I just hope and pray that I never have to cross this bridge.

By: leighdu

leighdu — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 17:32:56 +0000

Unfortunately I have seen that lots of times. Loved ones fear that their addict will get killed trying to get the money themselves, or they just don’t want them to be in pain. I have never been in that situation before, but I can imagine that it is not a pleasant thing to go through at all.

I do however, have a friend who is giving her sister in law money all the time to go party on because she threatens all the time to take her kids far far away if she can’t have money. Her reasoning is that she cannot make ends meet in the town she lives in, but yet when given money the first thing she does it waste it all on partying.

By: dreamr802

dreamr802 — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 15:20:52 +0000

I did see that episode of intervention. I can see the mother’s point of wanting her son to be safe but she couldn’t let him get healthy because of the withdrawls. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I was a mother in that situation, but I know that a mother’s instinct is to protect.

I think the big issue is people don’t realize that they are enabling their loved ones addiction. The person who needs rehab is obviously the one with the addiction, but I think the whole family and loved ones of that person should be included in that rehab/therapy. I think that is the only way someone will stay clean, that is to have a strong and structured support system.

By: attagirl

attagirl — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 21:23:48 +0000

“There is a desire to keep family secrets or not rock the boat. Part of enabling, just like active addiction, is denial. In the beginning the enabler will make all sorts of rationalizations and try to minimize the problem; ignore it and hope it goes away. This does not happen.”

This is more of a problem then people are really realizing. And this works in all area of like not just addiction. Eventually causing more chaos than the (enabler) person is willing or wanting to have. It can cause problems in areas of their lives and before they know it they are not sure what they can or should do to stop this.

By: illytodd

illytodd — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 00:34:38 +0000

Some people forget that when a loved one goes into recovery that the people around them may need to get some help as well. Family members may feed of their loved ones addictions and become co-dependent. It can be hard for them to find their own identity again once the drama of the addicted person is no longer there for them.