Somtimes when in addiction recovery, we can feel the familiar tug of messages learned early in life. Unfortunately, these may be garbage messages. Usually they were used in childhood to teach us lessons as our parents learned them. This can cause problems if we carry things learned as a child which are not functional into our adult life. Here are some garbage messages in addiction recovery:
Don’t say anything if you can’t say something nice.
Hide your true feelings.
Family business is private business.
Don’t trust.
Work first, play later.
What you do is more important than who you are.
Boy’s don’t cry.
Men should always be strong.
Women shouldn’t get angry.
Women should cover up angry feelings.
Don’t talk about sex.
There is something wrong with our bodies.
You made your bed now lie in it.
There is no room for mistakes.
Anything worth doing is worth doing well.
Strive for perfectionism in everything.
Money doesn’t grow on trees.
Watch whatever you spend.
You can do better.
Strive for perfectionism in everything.
I told you so.
You should have listened and did what I said. I am right and you are wrong.
Don’t hang your dirty laundry in public.
Don’t talk and don’t ask for help
Blood is thicker than water.
Family loyalty comes first whether or not it is deserved.
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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Nice post! Informative and really hit bullseye. I wonder if people are even aware of this.
I couldn’t agree more than you! People should be allowed to be who they are and we should learn how to accept people for who what truly are. The faking your feelings trick will not last long…