Helping alcoholics is a notoriously difficult thing to do. Perhaps the best we can do is offer a system of recovery that works for them and encourage them to find out what that system is.
Part of the problem with traditional recovery is that it usually seeks to fit the alcoholic into the program instead of fitting a program to the alcoholic. This is a problem and based on existing recovery rates you can be sure that this method of treatment doesn’t really work all that well. Relapse rates are miserably low with seemingly no answer in sight for the struggling alcoholic.
The solution to this is in customization. It is ridiculous to think that there is only one way to help an alcoholic, or that there is only one program or one method of help that can work for everyone. This is just silly. Different alcoholics have found recovery over the years through using different programs and different techniques. No one solution will work for everyone. This is an obvious truth to anyone who has stepped back and looked at the big picture. Unfortunately, many people do not consider this idea and insist that there is only one solution for alcoholism. Usually this points to 12 step programs such as AA and NA that have essentially become what we refer to as "traditional recovery." These solutions are widespread and, while helpful, don’t really produce very good success rates.
For the majority of alcoholics, offering them only one solution of AA is like trying to push a square peg into a round hole. It is just a poor fit for some people and they would actually do much better with an alternative program of recovery. In these cases, however, we almost always fault the individual instead of the recovery program, and say that "they just don’t want recovery bad enough" or they would certainly be able to make this simple 12 step program work for themselves. This is an unfair and arrogant attitude that prevents people from making real growth in recovery.
So what is the solution? For some the solution will be in the customization of a recovery program to their own unique life. Sometimes this is best accomplished through sponsorship or with a life coach. Other times a person can push themselves to grow in different ways in order to achieve a successful life in recovery.
A big part of this is holistic growth. We must push ourselves to grow in different areas of our life. For example, instead of just focusing on the spiritual solution that is preached in traditional recovery circles, we would focus on our physical health, exercise and nutrition, emotional balance, relationships, education, and so on. All of these areas and more deserve our attention in recovery. When we focus on making holistic growth like this, the dividends are huge for our long term outlook. The push for holistic growth is like an insurance against complacency in the future. Growing holistically (instead of just spiritually) ensures that we achieve a balance in our lives that is necessary for long term sobriety.
Helping an alcoholic to find this path is not easy, but it can be done if the person is willing to change their life in a number of different ways. Structural changes are more powerful than small tactical changes. For example, instead of just attending AA meetings on a random basis, make a commitment to chair a certain meeting on a regular basis. This introduces consistency and accountability.
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Good advice. You should avoid confronting an alcoholic alone especially if they have been drinking. They are defensive and usually feel that they have things under control.
Thank you for the insights in regards to taking a more holistic approach to treating alcoholism. I couldn’t agree more that taking care of the body by incorporating good nutrition and exercise definitely stacks the cards in the favor of the alcoholic seeking recovery. Treating emotional and spiritual elements are also important. Although there is yet to be a silver bullet in the treatment of this devastating disease, treating the alcoholic in a holistic way is a very good way to start.
This is one of the things that bothers me the most when I watch shows like Intervention . . . the thought that there’s a one-size-fits-all when it comes to recovery. Well, that and throwing a recovering addict straight back into the environment that helped create the problem in the first place. This article is a breath of fresh air! Thanks!
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This is a very difficult thing to do, most would say it is downright impossible. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t make a difference in the potential sobriety of a person. Show your support as best you can and let them know that you will support them in any way that you can if they choose to stop drinking.There are no secret tricks or manipulations when it comes to this stuff. So basically, there is no way to directly convince an alcoholic to quit drinking.
An alcoholic can be helped to find freedom from their addiction. But, helping an alcoholic is possible given the right set of circumstances. What I have observed is that certain conditions must be manifested in the person or their lives to bring about acceptance and begin to recover.Alcoholism is different from most other diseases in that sympathy with not help. To show a feeling of sorrow for an alcoholic only confirms their own sense of low self-worth.
Don’t help the alcoholic by enabling their addictive behavior. Don’t help them to bed. Don’t let them drive while drinking. Do not let them argue, fuss or fight with you while they are drinking. Do not talk to them, leave the house or room and shut and lock the door behind you. Do not buy them alcohol, even if they beg you to. Don’t let them drive! Don’t treat them any differently because they have a drinking problem. Don’t give them any special attention while they are drinking.
My wife is an alcholic that works everyday, and I would say that most people have no idea she has a problem. Even I for the longest time, didn’t believe it. We have been married now for almost 11 years and her drinking has become a true issue. I have asked her to stop, I have offered my support in everyway possible to help her. She is in denial that she has a problem. She will not seek help and I don’t know what to do. I love her and she is such a good woman. The only advice I see for people that love alcoholics is to leave them. Is there any other way???
Overcoming an addiction to alcohol can be a long and bumpy road. At times, it may even feel impossible. But it’s not.Changing problem drinking habits takes time, especially if your social life has revolved around alcohol or you’ve used drinking to cope with stress and numb your emotions. There is no quick and easy fix. Alcohol recovery is a process—one that often involves setbacks. Cravings for alcohol can be intense, particularly in the first six months after you quit drinking. Good alcohol treatment prepares your for these challenges, helping you develop new coping skills to deal with stressful situations, alcohol cravings, and social pressure to drink.
It is great to know that there are people who strives to help those individuals under the yoke of drugs
drugs. But, it is really a difficult thing to do. That’s why I am very inspired for people with helping hand. I hope they will continue to help others.
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This is such an excellent and insightful article .
Took me time to read your post and I really enjoyed reading it. I must say that this interesting topic on how to help alcoholics. I’m glad you have done a great job by bringing this topic into discussion.
I hope quality discussions follow this post. Good luck with the challenge and with your business.
Make the decision to get help. Recognizing the need for help is one important thing to do. There are a lot of alcohol rehabilitation centers that could give you assistance for your treatment. You can also get different kinds of help from your family, friends, and above all from God.Have a desire to stop the alcohol addiction. You must have a serious desire to stop from being an alcoholic.
I’ve tried to quit alcohol several times but it seems like a very bad habit which has stuck to me like glue. Can you guide me on the “12 step programs such as AA and NA” which you have mentioned in this post. It will be really helpful. Thanks in advance.
You’re right Bill that in order to help an alcoholic one has to use structural changes.It is also true that is very difficult to determine an alcoholic to admit his/her problem but everything is possible if you know how to deal with him.Communication is essential in order to obtain results.Jennifer Howell Alcohol Rehab San Francisco
Helping alcoholics turn away their habits is a good idea. And it can help to boost our economic status.
Alcohol addiction can lead to a lot of illness not just physically but mental illness as well.Being addicted to liquors is hard to reverse,it takes a lot of cooperation coming from the person involve.
Helping alcoholics to get out of their vice is not really easy at all. Motivation is the best thing to do, motivate the person that there are more great things out there than alcohol, and show them that life. Be a good example, may this one work.
Alcoholics need to have the will power to quite this addiction. Not being an alcoholic can be very difficult to understand what they are going through. There are many options out there for great help for this addiction and I believe that with the right help it can be cured.
i enjoy your article. great job. keep it simple
Its very sad that people got an addiction of alcohol. You can use it some times but not offen otherwise you can became an alcoholic and this it many, many years of clinics. I lost my friend because he was an alcoholic, he got stroke and past away.