The good news is that millions have brought their addiction to drugs and alcohol into a state of remission; the bad news is that a far larger number have been unable to do so.
Why is that? What do the abstinent people do? Well I promised you a simple answer here we go:
1. They stopped using. Completely. That means all mood altering substances as well as going through the detox and withdrawal process without giving up.
2. They committed with overpowering force and determination to handling themselves and life with its ups and downs without drugs and alcohol. It is no longer an option
3. They got help and support from every imaginable resource and employed it on a daily basis; that means treatment, family support, God or a Higher Power, friends, 12 step support. They did not go it alone.
I don’t know, does that really seem complicated?
Well, the reality is that it is simple in concept, but difficult in execution, for a wide variety of reasons. Most of the reasons for returning to drug use are not due to outside influences, such as people, place and things; but rather internal emotional upheaval that the addict cannot process, control or contain.
In other words…the events of life and the world don’t make us use. We make ourselves use, from the inside out. Here are just a few things that can mess up those three simple steps above, off the top of my head:
1. Complacency, believing this isn’t so hard, not paying attention
2. Not REALLY making the decision to quit
3. Dishonesty, B.S.’ing yourself
4. Depression
5. Argumentativeness
6. Self pity
7. Cockiness
8. Expecting too much from others
9. Letting up on daily disciplines
10. Forgetting gratitude
11. Isolation
12. Selfishness
13. Not attending 12 meetings
14. Obsessive and compulsive thinking
15. Boredom
16. Maintaining resentments
17. Old “people, places and things”
18. Keeping drugs and/or alcohol in the house
19. Grandiosity
20. Major or sudden “life” changes
21. Exhaustion
22. Anger
23. Anxiety
24. Boredom
25. Stopping medications against your doctor’s advice
26. Shame
27. Self pity, dwelling on unresolved conflicts or past hurts
28. Loneliness and isolation
29. Fear
30. Frustration
I just scratched the tip of the iceberg on how many ways there are of self-sabotage in addiction recovery. On the flip side let me make this really simple:
“There is nothing on earth that can ‘make’ me use drugs or alcohol again, if I choose not to. I have that God-given ability to choose how I will handle life…with drugs or without drugs”
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
very nice post
Is it just me, or is boredom listed twice? lol
Either way is accurate (boredom is a dangerous place for me. I get bored & my mind starts to wander)
Thank you very much for this article. I think it will be very useful.
Jen,
Just testing you out…here are a couple of freebies:
31. I’ve been doing so welll…just one couldn’t hurt
32. If I really had a problem, I couldn’t have stopped for this long.
33. It wasn’t the drugs/alcohol that caused problems it was my_____________ (fill in the blank)
Hey Bill, one of the things that I think escape many of these sorts of posts is that addiction in the way we think of it also only develops in a relatively small (10-15%) of the population. Additionally, most of the people we normally refer to are polydrug users (use many drugs). In fact, most “pure”alcoholics have been found to go into remission without any treatment, but our typical sample has a much harder time… This is why I’m so involved in research – I think there’s a lot to be learned there.
Adi Jaffe´s last blog ..Better rehab services – Addiction research at work
I also like your artical.And your liner.such as people, place and things; but rather internal emotional upheaval that the addict cannot process, control or contain.
http://www.goarticles.com/cgi-bin/showa.cgi?C=2200618
IS THIS THE JEN HUBELL FROM S.C.S.? IF IT IS GOOD WORK,
CHECKING OUT THESE RCOVERY WEBSITES… STAY WITH IT !
No, sorry these are my original thoughts.
Bill Urell
You are right Adi. One thing I lose sight of sometimes is the fact that this blog si written from the mindset of being in addiction recovery, assuming a state of addiction. Also providing data about addiction. Sometimes I assume readers know that.
For example when i post on the dangers of marijuana use, I am speaking to the addict in recovery; for them it is not a good idea. Put non-addicted marijuana users are almost militant and I run afoul of them now and then.
Bill